Dear Margaret:  Six months ago my wife and I moved from a small town and are having trouble finding like-minded friends. We came from a relatively conservative thinking location where residents had social and political values that matched our own. We feel like we've landed on Mars in this big city! At business gatherings we feel like we have to keep our mouths shut so as not to offend my more left leaning colleagues. We need advice so we can socialize freely in this new area. People are going to get the idea we are dullards with no opinions. How can we integrate into this community?
Landed on Mars

Dear Landed on Mars: As long as you hold and express your opinions without hostility, and allow others to do the same, you should not feel the need to muzzle yourself. I'm sure you realize that in the current political climate you're not alone in how you feel. There are any number of ice breakers you could employ in a social gathering without an air of contentiousness. You can inquire and take interest in their family, talk about leisure activities, or what your dreams for the future might hold, for starters. My idea of a dull party is where conservative or liberal values is the only topic of conversation. That doesn't have to be all you have to bring to a party. If you are itching to make this a topic for discussion, any city, regardless of an overall political leaning, will most certainly have venues to enable you to share your views openly. Give yourself time to search out other social groups. Business gatherings needn't be your only outlet.

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