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Editorial

When a story hit about Boston Dynamics' newest robot being able to open doors, a lot of the response on social media was, 'Oh, that's creepy!'  But while it is certainly unusual to see a mechanical device that looks like a yellow greyhound walking around, and politely opening a door for another robot that can't open doors, it seems like a very good idea to me.

Is the creepy part that it looks like a dog that can open doors with a robot arm?  Or is it that people on social media who will share every little detail of their lives publicly don't want some robot letting itself into their rooms to find them... typing, I would have to guess, because that's all they do any more, isn't it?

If it is the dog part, maybe I am not understanding the creepy factor because I once had a cat that could open doors.  She repeatedly let herself into forbidden territory.  We stayed at my grandparent's house one summer on the condition that my two cats - a white one and a black one - would be confined to a small bedroom upstairs.  My grandmother was confounded when she opened the linen closet door to see two green eyes staring back at her from the back of the linens.  The white one had climbed up on her sewing table, reached over and worked the door knob.  The black one escaped, and jumped up about four feet onto the linen closet shelf.  In the dark far recesses of the linen closet all you could see of the black cat was her eyes as she lounged defiantly on the fluffy clean towels.  These two spent the whole summer escaping that little room.  I think my grandmother was very happy when we left.

Even in her frustration she found it amusing, and I thought it was hysterical - except that the white cat did the same thing at my house, letting herself into the room where I kept my art supplies, which, in the grand scheme of things, are nothing but the best cat toys ever.

So how would I feel about robot cats that could open doors?  Probably about the same, but with the added benefit tht I could turn it off.


There are so many things that are too dangerous for humans to do.  How is it a bad idea for machines to do them?  We've had bomb squad robots for years now, and the military has used robots to carry equipment, sweep for mines, and for search and rescue operations.  Drone aircraft are remote controlled robots that perform surveillance and deliver missiles.  Robot vacuum cleaners have been around for a long time.  And there's Jibo -- not sure what it does, but it looks friendly and its literature claims it is charming (actually it seems to be more of a very expensive Alexa-like device that can do the twist than an actual robot...).

Having robots do things harmful to humans seems to be a good idea.  Especially if you are a human.  Wouldn't you rather have a robot blown up than a human member of the bomb squad?  Or an American soldier?  Of course this is the excuse robots will have when the robot apocalypse comes along and they kill all of us and take over the world.  But at this point robots aren't smart enough, so I think we're safe.

There is an argument that robots should not be made to look like people (and yes, they do have robotic sex dolls that look like people who have had a lot of plastic surgery -- I suppose they actually have if they're made of plastic...  And, by the way, ew!) because actual people are creeped out by that.  The argument goes that robots should just be functional looking things and not try to walk like a human and talk like a human.  A good example is robot vacuum cleaners.  Most of them are disks that tool around your living room sucking up dirt and making beeping sounds that perfectly serve the purpose of letting you know that it has started vacuuming, has begun recharging, or is stuck hopelessly in the fringe of your priceless oriental carpet.  They don't look or act like humans.  They don't talk.  They're just cleaning machines that are as smart as they need to be so that you don't have to vacuum yourself.

My son, who is of the generation you would expect to love all things electronic, absolutely hates machines that talk to you.  He won't use a talking vending machine (OK, I see his point, those things ARE creepy!) and turns off the voice on his GPS.  As for me, I really hate Siri in part because 'she' has a bad attitude, and in part because she is far from being an actual virtual assistant (so is Alexa, Cortana, and all the rest).  You can't have a conversation with her.  She answers your question, sure (and often answers a question you didn't ask instead of the one you did ask), but you can't reply to her answer and expect her to converse.

Still, wouldn't it be great if you could say, 'Hey vacuum cleaner, you missed a spot over there' and see it scurry to the corner to pick up your spilled Dorito crumbs?

Maybe not.

Anyway, check out the video and see how you feel?  Useful or creepy?  Because robots are no longer the future.  They're now.

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