Dear Margaret: I'm dating a guy who is head over heels about me. He's very attentive, showers me with praise and thinks to bring me small gifts every so often. The problem is, he seems to be overly attentive. He wants to be around me all of the time AND gets very jealous if someone else pays attention to me. At first it was flattering. Now it feels creepy and scary. If I even smile at a clerk in the checkout line at the grocery store he starts accusing me of being unfaithful. I don't want to make too much of this, but I also don't want to feel worried when someone of the opposite sex is merely being friendly. How can I approach this subject with him without making a big deal out of it?
With Jealous Boyfriend

Dear With Jealous Boyfriend: Do you really want to spend time with someone who is so jealous that he ignites fear in you? And, how much time and effort do you want to spend trying to work this problem out with no guarantee that he will be able to feel more secure in your relationship? You didn't mention that you were as head over heels for him as he is for you. If you decide you want to give this a try, wait until the jealous moment has passed, and let him know that the incident made you feel afraid (or however it made you feel). Know that this is a problem that won't be resolved in one conversation – or several. If this is truly someone you want to cultivate a deep relationship with, take that first step.

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