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Editorial

If you want to annoy me call my cell phone and try to sell me something.  Because it's a cell phone, stupid, not a sell phone!  And if you really, really want to tick me off, send me a text solicitation.  And that includes political texts.  Oh boy! does that include political texts!  I'm talking to you, Julie!

I estimate that over 80% of the calls we get on our business phone are spam calls.  I don't like them, but I can vaguely understand that people who have something to sell would try to sell them to businesses on the telephone.  Personally, I think it should be outlawed.  But I consider my cell phone a private haven that I share only with people I know.

Political TextI was quietly reading my book when the text ping sound made me to jump nine feet straight up from my chair, almost hitting my head on the ceiling -- we have a high ceiling in that room -- I was not pleased.  It was from 'Julie with NY Dems!' I found it disturbing, annoying... and creepy.  She not only knew my phone number, which is not listed, but she also knew my name.

ARE YOU STALKING ME, JULIE?????

She obviously does not know me because a) I don't go by 'Daniel' and 2) I am really, really aggravated by texts from anyone but a small circle of friends and relatives, the NYSEG power-outage alert bot, and texts from UPS telling me my package has been delivered.  Everyone loves to get a package!

And Julie, what makes you think I am going to vote for Democrats, especially when you are invading my privacy, interrupting my book, and startling the heck out of me?  That is not a winning strategy, Julie.  I was really engrossed in the book

Is it that you think I am a Democrat?  Because I have news for you, Julie.  I am not and have never been affiliated with any political party.  I choose candidates on the merits.  I do not vote for a party.  I vote for individuals.  So you may or may not "REALLY" need me to vote.  How do you know?  Maybe you are encouraging me to vote for your worst nightmare.  Again, not a very smart strategy.

My first impulse was to send a scathing reply text saying that I could never vote for a member of a party that disrespects the Federal Trade Commission's (FTC) Do Not Call Registry.  But I looked it up.  While the registry does cover texts as well as voice calls, political and non-profit organizations are exempted from the ban.

I don't get why anybody is exempted.  Well, almost everybody. The recent Presidential Alert had everyone up in arms, but I actually do understand how there could be a national emergency that it could be substantially beneficial to be alerted about.  The current leader of the free world makes me worry that a national golfing emergency might blast across the cell phones of America, but so far we have been spared.

But political texts?  How do they rise to the level of exemption from 'Do Not Call'?  They sink to the level of propaganda.

As for non-profits, well, we all have soft spots for them, but I don't believe they should be allowed to call my phone unless they are returning my call.  But nobody has a soft spot for political spammers.  That's you, Julie.

Solicitations should be relegated, by law, to postal mail only.  That mail sits in your mailbox quietly, and when you see it -- when you decide to see it -- you have the option of opening it or tossing it directly into the recycling bin where it can be turned into something useful like origami or a book or milk carton.  This plan would also have the benefit of rescuing the struggling US Postal Service, because all of the spam phone calls, texts, and emails would be eliminated, greatly increasing the amount of postal mailings.

So, Julie, let's review.  You want me to vote, but you don't know who I will vote for.  But you are from a major political party, so presumably you want me to vote for your candidates.  So your strategy is to interrupt my day, aggravate me, and you think this will make me vote to your benefit, even though you have no idea who I would vote for.  Smart, Julie, really smart.

As you may have gathered from the screen shot above, I did not give in to my impulse.  I already knew who I was going to vote for, and, as always, they are individuals I think will best serve our community.  Different parties, including, as it happens, yours, Julie.  It occurred to me that changing my mind and voting against all Democrats wouldn't serve my community at all well, even if it would give me satisfaction to text you back Wednesday morning while you are eating your Fruit Loops, to tell you exactly how your strategy panned out.  My image of your very colorful spit take amuses me.  But that's no way to pick leaders, so I will have to be satisfied with the image in my imagination unless you want to take a selfie spewing Fruit Loops and post it on Twitter.  I would enjoy that.

Your text had exactly zero effect on me, Julie, except that is made me much angrier than a little text ought to.  You invaded my private haven, Julie.  I don't know you Julie.  Don't send me political texts.

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