- By Jim Evans
- Entertainment
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Smart TalkSMART TALK By Clara Dix, N.P.
LITE: Perhaps that quintessentially 70s song title should be spelled, "You Lite Up My Life." The sappy song and the cutely misspelled title deserve each other, like black velvet paintings and lawn ornaments.
All uses of lite have officially been banned at the Institute for the Linguistically Impaired. The Fowler Lounge will never stock the beer of that name. The institute's dietician isn't allowed to order any foods with that word on the label.
When Rev. "Red" Johnson, pastor of The Complete and Total Faith Church of the Whole Entire World, here in Underbelly, Texas, put "Jesus the Lite of the World" on his sign board, institute members immediately transferred to Sister Polly Cotton's One Single Solitary Way Church of the Baptized Brethren and Sistren.
Our therapists urge their patients to join the boycott and help bring light back to the world.
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