- By Matthew P. Binkewicz
- Around Town
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Lansing's Advice Column
Dear IMO,
Our daughter will graduate this June. Although she is not an honor student, she is bright and does get solid “B’s” in her school work. She has decided not to attend college in the fall. My husband and I are upset with her decision. What can we do to convince her that college is the best option?
Thanks,
Sheila
Dear Sheila,
You are not alone in your struggles with your daughter. Parents are facing this issue more often than you might imagine. Today’s high school students are less motivated to continue on to college immediately after high school graduation. This does not mean they are choosing to skip college altogether. They are merely exploring other options.
Before you seek out ways to convince, bribe, or threaten your daughter into college, you might consider some simpler routes. You ought to sit down with her, and ask what she wants to do. Listen to her carefully without interrupting. Try to avoid the, “But-but-but” approach as she lists off the wonderful ways she can explore her own life. Perhaps she has a desire to enter the “Peace Corps” or other related organizations. There is no harm in this noble endeavor, and she will learn valuable lessons living and working in a foreign country. Even if she just wants to work at the local restaurant waitressing tables, you ought to allow her to make that choice.
Entering college immediately after high school graduation is no guarantee that she or anyone else will achieve greater success, fame, or fortune than those who choose not to. In fact, it might be an opportunity for her to learn one of life’s valuable lessons rarely taught on college campuses. By taking the time to listen to your daughter and respect her wishes, you might learn something about her that you did not know.
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