Archive: Around Town

Dear Margaret: My best friend is marrying a guy that no one likes. He seems to be arrogant and standoff-ish. He makes no attempt to ingratiate himself with her friends or her family. In fact, he seems to do the opposite. He doesn't attend the social gatherings when invited, and she generally comes to functions by herself. At a recent dinner where he actually accompanied my friend, he barely spoke and was borderline rude to me. I've invited them to my house on several occasions, and they never seems to be able to make it as a couple. I'm to the point where I don't even want to try to like the guy, and am afraid he is ruining my friendship with his soon-to-be-wife. How can I salvage my relationship with my friend?
Disapproving Friend

Dear Disapproving Friend: While this is a difficult situation, you don't have to keep trying to develop a relationship with the guy. It sounds like you've tried and he's not interested. If this friendship is one you value and care about, stay in contact with her. Suggest outings with her alone or with her and other friends. Reinforce the fact that you value your friendship with her. Be on the lookout for signs that your friend is becoming isolated in the months to come. Until and unless she makes it clear she doesn't value your friendship, let her know you are always there for her. If she is entering a difficult relationship, she will need you.

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