Archive: Around Town

My life feels topsy-turvy lately. My marriage has always been strong, predictable and stable. However, lately my husband seems to be going through a midlife crisis. He's unpredictable, restless, trying new ventures, and it scares me. I don't know if I can keep up, or if I even want to keep up with his pace of change. I worry that I will lose him if I don't make changes along with him. I feel like I'm living in fear and am not sure how to cope or even how to act or react in this new phase of our lives. What advice can you give me on coping with this new situation?
Slow Down, Moving Too Fast

Dear Slow Down, Moving Too Fast: You didn't mention that your husband is even asking you to change, so that's one fear you can put to rest. Midlife crises are real, and the shakeup doesn't last forever. He will settle into a new pattern at some point, and his behavior will become recognizable again. However, it might possibly be different from that which you had become familiar. There are times in life when employing strength is necessary, and for you this may be one of them. By strength, I mean a forbearance and a quiet determination to see through moments that are difficult. What if you replaced fear of his new ventures with genuine curiosity? It's very possible he would interpret your curiosity with interest in his new activities, and that might may be enough. Strength, curiosity, love and perseverance are what the situation requires. My best to you.

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