Archive: Around Town

Dear Margaret: A friend of mine recently turned to religion and will no longer associate with me. She preached to me and invited me to attend her church for several weeks. After my kindly refusals, she has given up on me converting to her way of worshipping and apparently our friendship. She and I were close and I came to depend on our friendship. This has really thrown me off course. I don't know if there is anything I can say or do, short of converting to her religion, which can repair our relationship. And I definitely do want to resume our companionship. How can I best resolve this problem?
Torn

Dear Torn: I'm sorry that you're experiencing this division in your relationship with a close friend. It is a shame that we are not able to stay in relationships due to religion, political views or differences in lifestyle. You are doing the right thing by respecting your own boundaries. Furthermore, you might say that your friend is also finally respecting your boundaries by not continually trying to step over yours. It must have been exhausting for you to always be on guard and stand firm in what you believe, or don't believe. It can be painful to give up one thing you value, your friend, to save another thing you treasure, your freedom to choose how you worship or not. The decision you made amounts to being true to yourself. Understanding that you made the right choice is the only way to resolve the problem, even though it hurts.

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