- By Matthew P. Binkewicz
- Around Town
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Ask IMOAsk IMOLansing's Advice Column
Dear IMO,
I need your advice on a very sensitive topic. Our mom suffers from dementia. For nearly two years, my sister and I have shared in her care along with private help from a home nursing agency. Her condition continues to decline. Within a few months, we will have to place our mom in a nursing facility. Both my sister and I feel terrible about this decision, but neither of us can care for her in our own homes. We have done our best to keep her in her own apartment for as long as physically and financially possible. Can you give us some advice as how we should proceed with her placement?
Sincerely,
Pamela
Dear Pamela,
Millions of Americans are facing the same dilemma you and your sister now face: how best to provide care for elderly parents. In your case, your mother’s condition is complicated by dementia. Your participation in her care for nearly two years is very admirable, and provides you with a valuable lesson into the complex world of elder care.
You and your sister should visit the nursing facilities in your area and ask questions about the care specifically dealing with your mother’s physical and mental condition. Some facilities are better equipped to care for dementia patients.
In addition, you should ask friends, your mother’s physician, or your pastor their opinions about the local nursing facilities. If you have friends whose parents are in a local facility, ask them their opinion on the care and quality of life at these places. Talk with the staff at each facility and see what care they provide on all levels—physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual, and social.
You may want to visit websites to learn state and federal regulations concerning care for dementia patients. Weigh all your evidence and determine which facility will provide the best possible care for your mom. She deserves nothing but the best.
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