Archive: Opinions

I was excited.  Out of the blue, an email informed me that Katrina, my Russian bride, was ready for me.  I asked my wife and she said I could have her if she does windows.  With the kids grown up and out of the house we even had a room to keep her in.

Anyone with half a brain knows that there is no Katrina (and if I had any doubts they were quelled when I noticed that Katrina's emails came from an entirely different name).  If I replied the beautiful Katrina, who is probably a 45 year old hairy man named Boris with a Dokha and a vodka belly, would ask me for money to come to America so she could be with me and wash my windows.  After I sent some she would probably ask for more, for a wedding dress or shoes, or something, and she would stop contacting me only after I stopped sending money.


That one is pretty obvious, and while I yearn for my lovely Katrina I am resigned to the fact thatI will never meet her.

The more difficult ones are the ones that might be true.  They send out so many of these spams that they are bound to connect with some percentage of their victim pool.  Like the friendly receipt from the New York City Department of Finance confirming my credit card payment of over $7,000 (plus a $400 convenience fee) for outstanding traffic tickets.

As it happened I have been waiting for a confirmation from the DMV for something else entirely.  So if I had been in a hurry and clicked on the attachment I could have had a very sick computer.  But I have learned to pay attention, and so should you.  

You know the one where someone pretends to be someone you know who claims to be in a jam in a foreign country?  And needs a money transfer immediately to avoid going to jail or whatever?  I know people who fell for that one.  In fact, I know several very intelligent and accomplished people who have fallen for malicious email scams, clicking without thinking about it and then finding they computer filled with nasty viruses and malware.  It's like a traffic accident: it only takes an instant to go from normality to personal hell.

These malicious ones are surrounded with just plain spam that advertises some thing or other.  They are probably not legitimate either.  When you click to order the thing the links take you to a fake Web site in which you enter your credit card info.  That is tantamount to just handing these jerks your money, just to pay a 'stupid tax'.  Or Amazon Survey Rewards, that no doubt have you sign in to get your 'reward', which gives the thieves you Amazon username and password so they can buy themselves stuff on your account.

Or some others where they hack the email address of someone you know, then use their address book to send you a malicious attachment or send you to a malicious Web site.  Which means that even if you (think you) know who sent you the mail you should not click on a link or open an attachment unless you are absolutely sure you know it came from that actual person.

I am up to a personal best (worst?) at the moment, receiving over 2,000 spam emails three or four days a week, and around 1,000 the rest of the week.  This means it is easier for me to delete legitimate emails, and that I waste a lot of time every day dealing with the myriad of spam emails that get past my spam filter.

But the time is worth it in the sense that I cull out the mail I should be getting and delete the rest without looking at it or clicking on anything.

If only I could have Katrina... I would assign her the task of culling out the legitimate email from the nasty or gratuitous.  That would save me so much time and aggravation.  Because a human spam/scam filter is much better than any software and Web-based spam filters imaginable, and I know Katrina will be up to the job.  Plus she can do windows.

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