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dearmargaret I grew up in a home where there was often open hostility and violence. I have to say, it's left me with a good deal of emotional trauma that I'm trying to navigate as an adult. I have deep feelings of resentment for the adults who should have protected me. I blame them, and want them to take accountability, but it seems they never will. As a child, I needed the adults to do their job, and now I'm left to heal from their neglect. How can I get them to own what they did? It will go a long way in my healing if they would take responsibility.
Left Holding the Bag

Dear Left Holding the Bag: First of all, you are to be commended for coming to the point in your life where you are searching for healing. Perhaps an acknowledgment from the adults in your young life, which should have acted like adults, would be a step forward for you. And I wouldn't discourage you from having a conversation with them if you feel it would be productive or appropriate. Another part of your healing will need to address the emotional trauma that left its imprint on you at present. This is your challenge now, which is, in a way, separate from their acts of neglect in the past. You might want to seek help from a traditional therapist. There are also less mainstream healing modalities that are extremely effective. EMDR and cranial sacral therapy are just a few of the many options available. You may be embarking on a long journey. Please be patient and kind with yourself. My very best to you as you undertake your process of recovery.

Click Here to write to Dear Margaret.  Margaret Snow is a Life Coach in Ithaca, NY.

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