- By Margaret Snow
- Around Town
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Dear Margaret: Some people have an easy time being around someone who has recently lost a close friend or relative in death. These people seem to know the right thing to say. It makes me uncomfortable, and what I end up doing is avoiding the grieving person, or when I see them, I ignore the situation. I feel like a jerk, but am afraid of saying the wrong thing. How can I remedy this situation? I'm not comfortable with sentimentality.Lost for Words
Dear Lost for Words: By virtue of the fact that you are uncomfortable with those grieving, want to say something appropriate, but don't know how, I'd suggest that you are sentimental and care about the person grieving. People don't always remember what someone said to them, but how it made them feel. How about saying something honest? You sound like you care, so express that you are sorry and care. Keep it short. Someone who has recently lost someone in many cases don't want to carry on a long conversation about it with acquaintances. If verbally expressing your feelings in that way doesn't feel accessible, you might send a thoughtful sympathy card. A small token of caring can mean so much.
Click Here to write to Dear Margaret. Margaret Snow is a Life Coach in Ithaca, NY.
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